I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
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I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
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I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
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