We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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