very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
third nipple confirmed
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
