I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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