i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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