you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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