i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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