i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
soo... how was my night?
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