I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
