is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
