while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Randomize
