she woke up with a sticky ear
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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