WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize