everyone is single if you try hard enough
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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