how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
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Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
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Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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