all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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