I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
