we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
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So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
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I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
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