jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Randomize
