Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Randomize
