i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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