You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
