the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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