So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
