I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
