Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize