There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize