Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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