omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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