Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
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