You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
