it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
So. Much. Porn.
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