what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
