I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
