Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize
