I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
how drunk are you?
Several
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
