i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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