yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
These tits shall not be calmed
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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