he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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