So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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