I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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