You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i just google imaged poop.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
You're like the curious george of whores
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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