i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize