Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
