I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
