then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
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