Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike

(1-917): View more from New York City

this is mike. we're done.

Fav 21 1142 3297
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(517): View more from Michigan

My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.

Fav 18 1133 4952
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(925): View more from California

I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me

Fav 26 6412 1102
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(406): View more from Montana

We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.

Fav 11 4860 1492
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(510): View more from California

You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink

Fav 3 3097 1046
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(803): View more from South Carolina

I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior

Fav 20 4500 1628
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(631): View more from New York

I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse

Fav 14 938 1672
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(828): View more from North Carolina

I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.

Fav 0 756 472
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(727): View more from Florida

Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.

Fav 0 42 15
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