Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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