I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
