In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
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